Applying Boundaries to Business

I've been lax on blogging in the last few days as we have spent significant time preparing for some large events and the management team is concentrating on putting our learning about boundaries to work...literally.

We are learning that you can't create and maintain boundaries without generating some type of conflict: whether overt or covert conflict. Albert Einstein said, "We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them." We are finding that few conflict ever just work themselves out - they just won't go away. Ignoring conflicts are lethal. The longer they fester the more likely they are to drain energy from more than just the parties involved.

What's the lesson? Resolve conflicts quickly. The old adage is true, "Never leave a nail sticking up where you find it." The speed in which the culture of the business addresses conflict will be the speed by which the business cultivates a healthy culture.

What Role Do I Play?

From: Working With You is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work

Continuing the learning: Before you can Unhook from a specific role at work, you must be able to identify what role you are playing.

Hero: takes pride in solving problems
:: Do I have to solve all problems?

Caretakers: makes people feel comfortable and safe
:: Do I have get so personally involved?

Rebel: question systems and methods
:: Can I practice impulse control?

Martyr: sacrifice time and energy for the company
:: How can manage my work load?

Entertainer: knows how to find humor in situations
:: Do I want popularity or respect?

Peacemaker: dislike confrontations and unpleasant interactions
:: How can I be honest?

Invisible One: Quiet and reserved
:: How do clearly state my ideas?

Where to Set Boundaries (2 of 2)

From: Working With You is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work

Continuing the learning:

Personal Information: Some people like to “tell all” while others keep personal information closer to “the vest.” The question is, “How much information is really enough to share? Does it determine whom I am with?”

Emotional Expression: Some people wear their emotions on their sleeve and vent regularly while others disguise it. The question is, “How important is it for me to be a person who is emotionally more on an even keel?”

Manners/Courtesy: Some people view personal greetings as a waste of time while others communicate them regularly. The question is, “What does being cordial mean to me? How do I want to treat others?”

Noise: Some people are comfortable with a noisy environment while others feel a bit assaulted by sounds. The question is, “How aware am I of my environment and how I affect others?”

Where to Set Boundaries (1 of 2)

From: Working With You is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work

Continuing the learning:

Time Boundaries: Some people schedule their lives by time while others see time as a suggestion - for instance, the meeting at 10 am can begin anytime between 10 am and 10:30 am. The question is, "What is my relationship to time? How do I honor time boundaries?"

Personal Space: Some people are more distant while others want a form of communal living. The question is, "How clear am I about my personal space? How can I communicate that to others while honoring their space?"

Keeping Your Word: Some people live by the motto "you're only as good as your word," while others see verbal commitments as fluid. The question is, "How do I feel about being honest and living up to any commitment I make?"